Ask the question, plant the seed: ASIST facilitator, Angela Kyle
Posted February 19th, 2025
Written by: Jeffrey Liu
This story contains explicit mentions of suicidality and the impacts of suicide.
Angela Kyle is an Applied Suicide Intervention Skills Training (ASIST) instructor with the Crisis Centre of BC. Since joining the organization in 2017, Angela has led upwards of one hundred ASIST training sessions, providing thousands of individuals with the invaluable ability to preserve lives in their communities. Her dedication to her role as a trainer is a result of her commitment to benevolence; her kindness is obvious through her interest in others and willingness to lend an ear, however and whenever.
Beneath her happy-go-lucky façade is an extraordinary story of strength, one that the Crisis Centre of BC has had the privilege of contributing to. She champions a forthright approach to handling instances of suicidality, encouraging us to address any suspicions of suicidal intentions in others without hesitance. By asking others about their emotions, we can demonstrate a willingness to help make sense of them.
Understand her philosophy and meet this plainclothes hero as we explore her connections to herself, her community, and the Centre.
What is ASIST?
ASIST is a two-day suicide intervention workshop. It covers topics such as – how do you know if someone’s thinking about suicide? How do you ask them if they’re thinking about it? What do I do if they say yes? How do I help them find a way to care for themselves?
Standard protocol regarding suicidality is to call the police and have them taken to a hospital to be seen by a doctor. However, the hospital is not equipped to handle cases of suicidality. They may perform a risk assessment, but even if someone states, ‘I’m going to end my life if you let me leave’, there’s not always a spot for them in the hospital. So they are often sent away, still feeling suicidal. Eventually, emergency services will be involved again. They will be taken to the hospital where they will not receive any further help; the cycle continues. ASIST presents an alternative, by means of empathetic conversation. What got you to thinking about suicide? And to listen, not problem solve, just hear their story. Many people don’t get the opportunity to be heard, but once they have it they feel this great relief.
Once they feel that relief, we ask what is it that you’re thinking about now? And they naturally begin to find their own reasons for wanting to live. From there, we discuss how to build a safe plan with them. In case those thoughts do return, we establish options to navigate them. The goal of an intervention is not to prevent all suicidal thoughts. It’s that if they do happen again, they’re going to come back for another intervention. They lived through it this time, so if the thoughts return, they’ll come back again for another one.
How did you initially get involved with the ASIST program?
I’m from Ontario and I started with the crisis centre in Niagara where they taught ASIST to all their volunteers. At the time, my partner struggled with her mental health and needed interventions so I stepped in and conducted quite a few with her. She continued to struggle with suicidal thoughts off and on over the span of four years. Some of our friends enrolled in ASIST training so that they could offer her support of their own. Unfortunately, she did end up taking her life, which was devastating.
But I believe if we didn’t have so many people around us that knew how to have a conversation with her about it, we would have lost her that first year. We got four extra years with her because we were able to use ASIST techniques with her.
After she passed, some of our friends believed she was selfish for acting on her emotions and frustrated for the trouble she caused. Of those friends, some began to find themselves contradicting their thoughts and having their own considerations of suicide. For me, this highlighted the fact that every time we did an intervention, we prevented the people close to us from having a reason to think about suicide. Interventions don’t just protect the individual. When you keep one person alive, you are also protecting the people and communities around them.
What drives you to continue working with the Crisis Centre of BC?
Hearing people come back and say, “Wow, I used this the very next day.” Validation that suicide happens and it’s best to be prepared for when it does.
People walk out and they say, “Thank you. I thought this was going to be the worst two days of my life and you made it fun.” I feel good leaving knowing that nobody’s walking out drained, exhausted, or bitter about attending. Instead, they find enjoyment in the process; when it’s over they’re talking to their friends, families, and colleagues spreading their enthusiasm about getting involved.
It’s not burdensome work, especially when you take good care of yourself. At the end of each day, we tell trainees their only homework is to set aside at least 10 minutes for self-care; to do something for yourself, something that just makes you feel good. This is also a chance to remind myself that prioritizing yourself is necessary to be an attentive and intentional caregiver.
What takeaway do you want everyone to absorb regarding suicide prevention?
Don’t be afraid to ask someone if they’re thinking about suicide. If you ever have any suspicion, any tinge in the back of your mind suggesting someone is having thoughts of suicide – even if for two seconds – you’re picking up on something. Ask the question. Even if the person says no, you’ve planted a seed. By addressing it, you’ve indicated that you are open to talking about it. You’ve let them know that if they ever find themselves thinking about suicide, they can come to you. Ask the question. Plant the seed.
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Crisis lines are available across British Columbia 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. If you or someone you know needs help, please call:
- 9-8-8 (call or text)
- 310-6789 (no area code needed)
- 1-800-SUICIDE / 1-800-784-2433
- 604-872-3311
If you are interested in learning suicide prevention skills, you can:
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